I was malingering on Twitter just now when fellow Cricket enthusiast and broadcaster @thecricketcouch pointed to this astoundingly entertaining piece of feedback on, what else machaan, Rediff.com. This choicest comment was posted by a reader in April 2005 in response to, I think, Prem Panicker’s online commentary during an India-Pakistan cricket match. Perhaps during this tour.
I am 50% sure this is a hoax comment. And 50% certain it is someone who has painstakingly translated their thoughts on the run from Tamil to English. I don’t care. It is so bloody funny.
Click to the page here. And search for the comment by Perumselva Pandiyan.
I reproduce it here in full. Enjoy.
***
Panicker saar: You are telling Pakistan is not having skin and India will bat out Pakistan skin and chase match for winning.
How India can chase Pakistan skin? Like that nonsense why you are telling public type of commentary? You are telling cricket commentary means you tell cricket commentary – why you are telling about skin and all? India also is not having skin because it is getting defeat in three times from Pakistan.
Also Tendulkar is Oozing, Balaji is Oozing and all India fellow is Oozing – bit Mohammed Kafi is not oozing because he is not brinjal eating fellow. But also I am putting open bet on you – you are having mustache means you take bet. I am telling starting for straight and putting bet: India will not win saar. If India win means I will wear komanam and run around your house and I will not keep mustache. If India is getting defeat means you except that Pakistan is super type of fellows and India name is in public toilet. Also please don’t keep mustache. Mustache is for male type of fellow. You are male type of fellow means you keep open bet.
Also Agarkar is useless only. Also Kumaran is best bowler for India why he is not getting chance? Also peoples are always telling that Aktha is putting 150 meter per second his balls, also Bert Lee is putting 150 meter per second in his balls. Kumara is bowling 200 meter per second in his balls. But Kumaran is not getting chance. Why you are not telling for Kumaran getting chance? Can you tell in open type of way? Are you seeing Kumaran’s balls in Ranji match and Test match in Australia? Even Steve Waugh [ Images ] is seeing Kumaran’s balls and getting afraid of his balls swinging and reverse cutting.
Kumaran is Tamilan and Dravidan man. He is not false Dravid like Dravid and he is also not false Tamilan like Balaji and all. Kumaran is clean Tamilian. Give Kumran chance also for showing reverse balls.
Yours Faithfully
Also Kumaran is original Tamilan with chest, mustache and all.
***
More Stuff from Mr. Pandian http://groups.google.com/group/rec.sport.cricket/browse_thread/thread/9c88439c52829e47/bc3ed5da668c7a8b?lnk=st&q=#bc3ed5da668c7a8b
Ha ha ha ha ha… *tears*
hahahahahahahaha… dehydrated after reading this! 😀
Numba Pandian is going viral… even better than Fake IPL
If the intent of this post is to be funny, it is not. Digging up Rediff articles and making fun of some guy’s comments from 5 years ago, just pathetic. Honestly, what is it with you Mallus and your obsession with Tamils. Just get over your inferiority complexes already.
The Typical Mallu – Thinks he’s better than other south indians (Tamils, Kannadigas, Andhrites), acts all smug with fellow south indians, but in the presence of north indians turns into a squealing lapdog and immediately claims to know Hindi very well. But at the end of the day is considered to be just another madrasi, lol.
Indian sense of humor, RIP 5000 BC- 2010 AD
http://localparty.tumblr.com/should be interesting ?! 🙂
I say it is a hoax. And I can’t believe anyone found this post offensive. From the look of it, it seems to be a mock-Tamilian-English post in the same vein as the Kolaveri song. Only makes me respect Tamil humour.
I don’t think it’s a hoax. I searched for that guy in Facebook and found one and only one person. His profile clarifies his credentials beyond any doubt. For another session of rib-tickling humor, read his “About Me” section of his FB profile.
http://ppnuggets.blogspot.com/ more from guru 🙂
Vintage stuff!
Sidin: Sounds like you haven’t read the best of PPandiyan yet! Here’s one other example – RSC legend PPandiyan on your favorite Indian bowler – Venkatesh Prasad. The context is that someone had claimed that speed guns had clocked Prasad at “100 km/s” (!!!).
————-
Why is prasad getting 100km/s? Is he eating mutton chicken type of good
health body food?he is eating ladys finger and getting ghee from Dildoa tin. Then he is
pulling his SPEED GUN (from inside underwear) and using on boys.
he is getting speed increase. He is getting it up becuase it is SPEED
GUN.”….
Prasad is damaal maami king. Cow is mother of all Damaal maamis.
Yours Faithfully
Perumselva Pandiyan
Wow Nice blog you have done a good job
This seems to be the work of the guy who writes this blog- http://localparty.tumblr.com/
I found Mr. Perumselva Pandiyan a very riveting character indeed. So much so that I undertook full on investigative google research to get to know more about him. It turns out (sort of) that Mr Pandiyan was quite a craze back then in 2005 with people wondering about his quality posts both on Rediff and Usenet much as we are doing here.
http://www.sporttaco.com/rec.sport.cricket/Perumselva_Pandiyan_on_Rediff_3994.html
and here is the gold-mine link from newsnet or some such stuff:
http://groups.google.com/groups?enc_author=UTCnfxkAAAC60OsaTvJRWspzDLMrdAAdRNB_5-5RV_hok2_tlERMZw&pli=1
He created ripples and fan threads/posts (like this one by me) when someone created that Facebook profile too:
https://groups.google.com/forum/?fromgroups#!topic/rec.sport.cricket/Ryo1YcUSMPk
After using Google’s “search with image” and then pouring over the Google search cache to delve deeper into the mystery has convinced me to say with a good degree of certainty that at least the Facebook profile is fake. The facebook profile pic is lifted off of flickr:
https://www.facebook.com/perumselva.pandiyan?sk=photos
http://www.flickr.com/photos/8724919@N04/3374470515
While its possible that the Flickr photo is of Mr Pandiyan too, I am employing Occam’s Razor and Mr Pandiyan’s hate for North Indians like the Flickr posting photographer to conclude that someone flicked the photo of Flickr to create the fake profile.
Further fan links
http://ppnuggets.blogspot.in/ (Yes, someone had already posted it. But this post will be incomplete without this blog)
http://groups.google.com/group/rec.sport.cricket/msg/58052fb6cf718021
As one can see from all these links and discussions, from 2005 to 2010 people were divided whether Mr PP is real or not and if pranksters sometimes imitated him to get cheap publicity. So its tough to say if this choice comment is a hoax or not.
One puzzling fact is while Mr. Pandiyan became this popular in various online fora, he did not quite garner as much popularity as the Fake IPL Player etc did. I was not much of an internet addict around 2005 (and was much younger too) and am not well-versed with the internet traditions and trends of that era to comment on that.
Check this out. Hahahahahah…PP calls Tsotsobe – ” Tethoscobe”…Seriously – i cant believe this guy is for real. Cant be unintentionally, this funny!
Check this out. Hahahahahah…PP calls Tsotsobe – ” Tethoscobe”…Seriously – i cant believe this guy is for real. Cant be unintentionally, this funny!http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=186979481317333&set=a.158221537526461.35473.100000158480993&type=3&theater
so, it begs the question. who won? who was finally entitled to keep his moustache?
I think this “Perumselva Pandiyan”
is non other than you Sidin!
A lot like this guy.. http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000960319229 Gujju Version of Mr. Pandiyan.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/726791370700280/
There’s a whole group dedicated to him