I was malingering on Twitter just now when fellow Cricket enthusiast and broadcaster @thecricketcouch pointed to this astoundingly entertaining piece of feedback on, what else machaan, Rediff.com. This choicest comment was posted by a reader in April 2005 in response to, I think, Prem Panicker's online commentary during an India-Pakistan cricket match. Perhaps during this tour.
I am 50% sure this is a hoax comment. And 50% certain it is someone who has painstakingly translated their thoughts on the run from Tamil to English. I don't care. It is so bloody funny.
Click to the page here. And search for the comment by Perumselva Pandiyan.
I reproduce it here in full. Enjoy.
Panicker saar: You are telling Pakistan is not having skin and India will bat out Pakistan skin and chase match for winning.
How India can chase Pakistan skin? Like that nonsense why you are telling public type of commentary? You are telling cricket commentary means you tell cricket commentary - why you are telling about skin and all? India also is not having skin because it is getting defeat in three times from Pakistan.
Also Tendulkar is Oozing, Balaji is Oozing and all India fellow is Oozing - bit Mohammed Kafi is not oozing because he is not brinjal eating fellow. But also I am putting open bet on you - you are having mustache means you take bet. I am telling starting for straight and putting bet: India will not win saar. If India win means I will wear komanam and run around your house and I will not keep mustache. If India is getting defeat means you except that Pakistan is super type of fellows and India name is in public toilet. Also please don't keep mustache. Mustache is for male type of fellow. You are male type of fellow means you keep open bet.
Also Agarkar is useless only. Also Kumaran is best bowler for India why he is not getting chance? Also peoples are always telling that Aktha is putting 150 meter per second his balls, also Bert Lee is putting 150 meter per second in his balls. Kumara is bowling 200 meter per second in his balls. But Kumaran is not getting chance. Why you are not telling for Kumaran getting chance? Can you tell in open type of way? Are you seeing Kumaran's balls in Ranji match and Test match in Australia? Even Steve Waugh [ Images ] is seeing Kumaran's balls and getting afraid of his balls swinging and reverse cutting.
Kumaran is Tamilan and Dravidan man. He is not false Dravid like Dravid and he is also not false Tamilan like Balaji and all. Kumaran is clean Tamilian. Give Kumran chance also for showing reverse balls.
Also Kumaran is original Tamilan with chest, mustache and all.